I know this isn't the most dramatic of your questions, and I also know you are not a doctor. So woman to woman, can you explain to me why sometimes when I wake up, I'm humping the bed?
You are hilarious…but normal. A lot of women use towels and sheets between their legs to cause friction against their clits in their sleep. It is equivalent to the way men rub their dicks when they are in a deep sleep. It is comforting and causes a chemical reaction in our brains that can even help us rest.