Monday, December 27, 2010

Moving without a Ring.

Dear Zane,

First and foremost, allow me to say thank you for novels that are intensifying to the mind, body and soul! My boyfriend and I have been together for six years, on and off. We both decided to give up the lives we once led to share one together. He is twenty-seven with one child and I am twenty-six with no offspring…at the moment! This is the first consistent year that we have been together. We now live together. However, he is beginning his law career in another state next year and asked me to come with him. I happily agreed. Because of our past, I wanted to take precautions. Would it be absurd for me to insist that we become engaged before we continue our journey together?

Signed,
Needed Advice

Dear Needed Advice,

What would be absurd is for you not to insist on being engaged—or better yet married—before you move with him to another state. While you are both still relatively young (under 30), six years is long enough for anyone to test drive a vehicle for any journey, like the one you have agreed to take together. You already live together, you have accepted his child, but now you are planning to make a huge sacrifice by following the man across state lines. I commend you for wanting to make sure that you will not find yourself in a crazy predicament after giving up so much to be with him. If he is not ready to get married, or at least ready to start making preparations to get married, you should reconsider the move. That does not mean that the relationship has to end but you certainly have to protect your best interest.

Blessings,
Zane

2 comments:

Tellmeasecret said...

since its on again off again do the long distance thing, ultamadims always back fire if not now years from now. my 2 cent

DVenomuzJ said...

Tellmeasecret is right to a degree....I think you will jeopardizing your relationship should you bring up marriage now. you said on again off again for 6 years....so how much time is really on? Plus you said you just experienced your 1st solid year together....so you've been a couple for 3 years? 3 years is too soon to get married. There are a lot ov things to consider in this case....Zane can't really tell you what to do without really knowing everything....thats my $2.50....